A (Non-Alcoholic) Toast to My Amazing Body
Nighttime sledding is one of my favorite winter traditions with Luke and Eva - We sled in our backyard and then we have a cozy slumber party in front of the fire. This year, we had a snow day out of school and after dinner, we bundled up and ventured outside for an hour of snowy bedtime fun! This is the second year in a row when sledding has made me incredibly aware of how amazing my body is.
Last year, I remember sledding with the kids right smack in the middle of 6 weeks of proton beam radiation and giving thanks out loud to the stars for my body, its strength and resilience and the fact that it could still trek up a snowy hill, despite the stress it was under. A month before that, I ran n a 3 mile Turkey Gobble running race on the 4 month anniversary of brain surgery (and I beat some college students…. I don't know if they noticed, But I did!). These days I get on the Hydrow for Live rows with Mike in the morning in the middle of Chemo treatments. I have an amazing body with a terrible disease. Believing in my body makes me stronger and more prepared to ask it to do hard things.
There are plenty of occasions when I have felt betrayed and angry with my body for my cancer diagnosis. Because I hate cancer and believe it has no place anywhere but in the past.. Because I can’t control my platelet counts, Liver function tests, and white Blood Cell counts. Becauase I can’t always control headaches, and hiccups and inflammation in my brain, or blindspots in my eyes and it often feels like it all controls me.
But here is my crazy. When it comes down to it, I think my body is amazing and I am so grateful that I am in this body. It is stronger than I ever knew and it can work harder than I may ever be able to believe. So, here's to you, my body, I’ll do everything I can with my doctors help to take the best care of you that I can.